Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Buckle Your Seatbelts...

“You can’t build a reputation on what you are going to do.” – Henry Ford

Word to the wise~ It is possible to actually gain weight by going to the gym. After putting in a solid forty-five minutes on the Precor machine yesterday, I picked my kids up from the Kid's Club. Lo and behold, they were offering free cake to the kids to advertise "Kidz Club Birthday Parties." Not being one to resist, when I saw the small sign that said, Members help yourself to cake, I gladly took a piece. 400 calories burnt on the machine... followed by 600 calories down the hatch in a mere 4 minutes. Ugh!

My family has a way of putting me in my place. We all know that I've had a rough few months when it comes to weight loss. My brothers think I'm the biggest joke on the planet and when we're together, the fat jokes start rolling.

Being the jokesters that my brothers are, they started writing a blog entry for me. It went something like this:

I fell off the wagon today. I was tired and I ate 37 pieces of cake. I also had a large pizza, but TOMORROW is the day that I start all over. I'm a fitness blogger and I've decided to write a blog about how to gain weight because that's what I do best. I've eaten so much that my hoo hah hurts so now I'm going to tell my husband to have at it.

Nice. I did get a laugh out of it, but sometimes people just don't understand how much of a battle weight loss is. So, since my brothers said that I've probably lost all of my readers due to the fact that I write a weight loss blog and have done nothing for the past two months besides gain weight, I decided today should be a day of accountability...

And here's a rundown of my day:

-Woke up, and immediately decided it was time to turn to the dark side. I hate coffee. I can't stand it. I brewed a fresh pot and decided to pretend it tasted good, and I ended up actually enjoying it. My friend, Courtney, was right. It woke me up, hopefully sped up my metabolism, and most of all was a diuretic. An hour later, I promise you I was just shy of five pounds lighter...

-Dropped my daughter off at preschool and then met a friend for a playdate at the park. My son only landed in timeout once. This could be a record.

-Ran to Wally World to pick up a pregnancy test. Don't worry- I probably have a
.0000001% chance of being preggo, but I confess I have pee on a stick syndrome. You should see how many tests I take when we are trying. Trust me- due to the fact that we're a thirty something year old married couple and we take super, duper extra precautions, I pretty much knew that I wasn't (I mean we're way safer now than I was in my younger years- Oops, shouldn't that be the other way around) but I had sore boobs, so I decided to make sure. It was my lucky day because they were out of single equate brand tests, so I saved the four bucks- and tonight Aunt Flo made her debut

-I then took my son to the bus stop, picked my daughter up, and headed to my mom's house. We had a healthy lunch and then she watched my daughter while I went for a run. Yes- a kick a$$ run. To many it was a slow jog, but to me it was an all out run. I walked for five minutes, ran twenty straight, walked ten, ran ten, and then couldn't run any more and finished the walk home. I felt soooo good. Maybe because I was getting total looks from construction workers. I was feeling good... until I realized they were also giving the dead deer on the side of the road the same look... so maybe they just do that to any fresh piece of meat. I'm sure I was quite the site. My thighs must have been super hungry because they were chomping and eating up my shorts the entire run. Why can't they just stay in place? I promptly got rid of them though- They were soaken wet after the run. I'd love to say it was sweat, but once again, that pesky bladder struck.

-I got my daughter, headed home, met my son at the bus, and fixed dinner. What, you might ask? Baked chicken breast and cous cous. Why, thank you very much. I got a quick shower and we got ready for the ball park.

-Speaking of ball park, I was all set to spend a night at practice. I was on a roll- I had drinks and snacks packed, an activity bag for my daughter, and I even remembered my chair. We actually made it on time and I thought I was in the running for mom of the year until only three of us showed up. We made a call to the coach am he was wondering why we weren't at the scrimmage. Oops... didn't get that memo. Lucky for us it was only three minutes away so we made in time for the game. I'm proud to say, my son was the standout player of the night. Not only hitting wise... but literally a standout player. Any kid not in uniform when the other players are stands out.:)

-After a trip to the park, we stopped by my aunt's house for a water break and then headed home for beddie bye. And here I sit rambling about a day in my life... And why? To kill time? Yes. To relax? Yes. To document a fabulous day? Yes. To fool myself and think people are reading this meaning it's somewhat adult conversation? Yes. To let you know how good I feel? Yes. To show you that from now on I'm going to write about what I did instead of what I'm going to do? Yes.

- During my run, I would love to say that I was motivated by a fabulous playlist. Well, that's kind of true. I did have a circa 1985 neon yellow sports radio complete with wire headband headphones. As I channel surfed, I enjoyed some Benny and the Jets, Eminem, T-Swizzle, and a few other songs that don't have anything in common with each other. When I was cooling down and walking up my mom's driveway, the last song to play was Darius Rucker's "come back, come back" song. Well guess what... this is my come back, come back blog.:)

So, Todd and Eric... I ate healthy, worked out, and I'm headed to bed before I kill my good day downing everything in my fridge. You can laugh all you want, but when I'm at my goal weight at Christmas you'll have to use your fat jokes on someone else. It won't be me. In true brother/sister fashion... I had a great day. Boo-Yah.:)


  1. Quit hating on your brothers! Especially, the hot one that just got back from China! We both love you and are very proud of you. You can do anything you put your mind too....and dont worry I wont tell your readers about the Anita's queso dip your were crushing at mom's yesterday...OOPS!