Mindset

I'm a lucky girl- I have a lot of amazing girlfriends, a very, very best friend that takes B-F-F to a crazy new level, girls that I can count on... and if all else fails lots of women in my family that will always have my back. But the older I get, I have realized that it's not about the number of friends that you have- for life is not a popularity contest. And the more I age, I realize that it's more about those you hold close to your heart- and those that when it comes down to it- you'd trust with your heart.

I've also learned that everyone needs a Kathryne in their life. I honestly think it's important to have a lady that you look up to and admire. I'm not talking about someone that you want what they have or covet. I'm talking about someone- in my case an entire family that you want to emulate. Someone that holds the same values as you do, someone who is positive, leads a life where she is kind, giving, and beautiful on the inside and out. And someone that is just a few steps ahead of you- so that she can give you advice without mothering you. Someone that is still hip but can also say "been there, done that"... as a friend.

During my L.A. Boxing experience, I randomly met that exact person- my very own Kathryne. Two years ago, she trained at L.A. Boxing and was trying to get her body back. Like me, she had been a stay at home mom while her boys were younger- and the more we talked, the more we realized we had so much in common- and a friendship blossomed.

This fall, Kathryne enlisted the help of a life coach/personal trainer and made the commitment to a twelve week transformation program. Through blood, sweat, and tears, Kathryne changed her body, mind, and soul and in the process she won a "little Black dress" transformation contest. After twelve weeks of working out, she ended up with gams that are HOT!!!

Not bad for a lady getting ready to send a son off to college- eh? In fact, I'd take those legs in a heartbeat!

This week I e-mailed Kathryne asking for some advice about how to get out of the rut I'm in (which I think over the past two weeks I've crawled out of!). We exchanged a couple e-mails and then we chatted on the phone. I was running an errand after having picked up my daughter from preschool and then having to pick my son up from school only to drive 30 minutes to spend an hour at the pool while he swims and I think she could sense how frazzled I was. I asked where she got the motivation from to follow thru and make the amazing changes. After talking for a while, she said the sweetest thing to me. She said, "Shelley, it took a lot of time. And ya know, maybe for you, it just might not be the season for you. It might not be the season of life. Enjoy your children." It was so heartfelt- we then laughed about our lives and she reminisced about how crazy she used to be and look when her sons were my children's age.

What she doesn't know is that when we got off the phone, I cried. It wasn't because I was upset, or sad, or down. It was because someone had basically said, "Shelley, I have been there. I know how you feel. And maybe you should just enjoy the moment and not worry about it. It took me ten years to be at a place to do this." It was because someone who understands me, someone I look up to, and someone that really wants the best for me genuinely said, "It's okay. I've been there, I get it, and it's just okay."

I can't tell you what peace I felt. The woman I admire so much told me "she gets it" and has been there. I think I felt a natural high for the next few hours.

And then something happened.

Those very words have become my very own inspiration. "It may not be the season." I love my family and children with all of my being- but how dare I say it's not the "season" for me. Why should I have to wait to feel good about the way I look? Why should I wait ten years to finally get my eating under control? Why should I just throw in the towel and surrender?

And since then, I've been in the gym, eating better, and motivated. This IS the season of change. And I can't wait to make strides and follow in Kathryne's footsteps- only I hope that it's way before my son goes off to college- and with her help, I'm on my way.:)